All posts by Jeremy Varner

Alterpedia – Leprechauns

In the Alters’ World (and the series of books found here), creatures of legend reveal themselves to the world. Born through genetic abnormalities, defects and mutations, the Alters have lived for centuries as outcasts of human society, hiding their true nature from the world while colorful stories have been written by many to describe what they’ve seen. How are these creatures different from what was described in the stories? What relationship do they have with humanity? Every entry of the Alterpedia will delve into a new creature from around the world. This week we cover:

Leprechauns

 

Mischievous, greedy, strangely well dressed for people who live underground – The Leprechaun are forever tied to the traditions of the Irish people. Though, like almost everything about the Irish across the ages, the Leprechaun have been treated unfairly as inhuman creatures with a sometimes evil origin and borderline evil behavior.

Though they are sometimes angry drunks

So, in the interest of giving them a fairer shake, let’s take a look at these figures and how they really relate to mankind.
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Alterpedia – Woodwoses

In the Alters’ World (and the series of books found here), creatures of legend reveal themselves to the world. Born through genetic abnormalities, defects and mutations, the Alters have lived for centuries as outcasts of human society, hiding their true nature from the world while colorful stories have been written by many to describe what they’ve seen. How are these creatures different from what was described in the stories? What relationship do they have with humanity? Every entry of the Alterpedia will delve into a new creature from around the world. This week we cover:

Woodwoses

Long depicted in artwork, rarely seen in lore, the Woodwose is both at once one of the most famous and unknown figures in mythology. Unlike those spoken of previously, the Woodwose are not frequently identified by casual observers. Though they’ve been in many works of art over the years, many have not known that the wild men of the woods were depictions of Alters. This has led them to being granted a privilege not many Alters have had: the ability to blend in. Though, even there, they’ve come to superstition, stereotype and misunderstanding.

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4 Reasons It’s a Good Thing George Lucas Retired

If you’re a sci-fi geek like me, you’ve probably heard this already, but for those who haven’t heard it: George Lucas retired. For those of you who feel good about this announcement, you’re probably saying to yourself “he used to be awesome but lately he’s been ruining his movies.” For those of you who feel bad about that announcement, you’re thinking about the fact you’ll never see another Star Wars or Indiana Jones movie again. But I look at these two groups and I think that there’s a flaw: George Lucas’ ideas were always more impressive than his actual work.

Don’t get me wrong, I love Star Wars and Indiana Jones, I never stopped loving them and actually think that the prequel trilogy and Crystal Skull are entertaining in their own rights. But when I think about George’s work and the perception that the quality has decreased I start to think about what exactly has changed for people besides the nostalgia factor. When I watched the original Star Wars trilogy as a kid I thought they were fun but I didn’t see them as perfect and the same went for Indiana Jones. Yet there are fans dedicated to the point that they devote a great deal of time out of their lives to that fandom.

Obviously, for a fandom this dedicated to be so off-put by the recent projects from this man, something had to have changed. But when I took a closer look, something I love to do, I realized there were some key changes between George Lucas of the 80s and George Lucas of the last decade. In the end, I came to a conclusion that would have some people up in arms.

Often, the worst thing to happen to George Lucas movies… was George Lucas.

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5 Rules of Dating to Avoid Bloodshed

bleeding heart White Red pictures, backgrounds and images

So you’re looking for a date and, if you’re one of those special people I spoke of previously, you might have a bit of anxiety over the chances that your romantic advances may be interpreted as reason to stab you with a sharpened piece of wood. Not that it would do any good, but they’d still try.

So let’s do a quick check on you and your behaviors and make sure that you don’t do anything we could consider… ill-advised, shall we?

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A Word to the Indies: Risk Aversion

Hello my indie friends, it’s time to gather around for story time again. For those who’ve come by here looking for more wisecracks about Vampires, that’ll be tomorrow. But I had a thought about something that stuck with me and I need to get it out of my system. I know most times when I get talking like this I start making broad stroke abstract statements about the potential of a better tomorrow and achieving our dreams. But today I’m talking about statistics!

No, no, I wont get into numbers. But I think that it’s something that everyone should probably hear because I know it’s been bugging me lately too. I’ve already talked once before about how you’re going to find a lot of people telling you that you’re going to fail. Usually the loudest voices telling you to give it up and go into something safer are the people who care about you. And, for some of those people, they’re possibly right to do so. After all, numbers don’t lie.

Sometimes they leave out a bit of the truth though.

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Do’s and Don’ts: Style Tips for Night Owls

It’s taken some time, your lifestyle wasn’t very accepted for a long time. But now everything’s starting to change and it’s time to get your groove on. You’ve been waiting for this opportunity, to get out there, be yourself and find a tasty thing to spend your nights with. There’s just one problem: you look like this.

 

The pale skin, the bad hair, the clothing being about a century out of fashion – you’ve got some problems. And, even if you’re more accepted in today’s society, those problems at a little hard to get past if you don’t approach it right. You’ve made the decision: it’s time for a makeover.

Let’s try not to screw it up, huh?

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Pirates vs Ninjas: SOPA, PIPA and ACTA

Sometimes, I’m made painfully aware that, as a US citizen, I might be stuck in some sort of magical bubble that prevents facts from reaching through. This isn’t to say I’m ignorant of what’s around me, I stay fairly well informed despite the media’s attempt to do otherwise. I’m just saying sometimes certain things happening in foreign countries will not quite be included in the “what’s around me” part of that statement. Every once in a while, certain world events will slip by unnoticed like a ninja and catch me off guard.

See, one of the things that I’ve observed for some time is that the US has been in two wars for a while. I don’t mean “wars” in the sense of “Iraq” and “Afghanistan” because those were just two fronts of the same war – “The War On Terrorism”. But there’s a second war that’s been pretty aggressively fought lately: The War On Piracy. All forms of piracy, from guys in speed boats to New Zealanders who store some files for people for a fee.

Well today, I spotted the ninja.

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Inherent BS: Word Count

Let’s face it, it’s impossible to escape the fact that we live in a world where “too long; didn’t read” is, itself, too long to be bothered with. The audacity of being so lazy you have to reduce an incomplete sentence into just letters can leave the mind boggling. In the next few years there’s little doubt we’ll be seeing the semi-colon go bye bye too. And, yes, my lack of faith in the internet’s tolerance of the English language is that strong. And I’m a novelist.

So, clearly, I’m also fucked.

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A Word To Indies: Graphic Design And You

Today, I’m going to talk to you about coloring in the lines and not treating your books like kindergarten art projects.

After recent posts about publishing, self publishing and the direction I think the future should go in – I was starting to look for other topics to talk about. But as I was looking at my long To-Do list I realized that there were still things I needed to do that I’ve seen a lot of indies mess up. In fact, I’ve messed them up here or there myself. So if anyone’s going to tell you this message, it should be one of your own:

You can’t do everything on your own unless you learn what you’re doing first.

Now this isn’t to say that you have to shell out a lot of cash to someone for everything you don’t know how to do. In fact, for most things that you’re not 100% certain on, you can probably learn how to do it. But there’s some things that you just cannot, under any circumstance, allow your inability to louse up. Specifically, for the purposes of this post: don’t fuck up your cover.

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Inherent BS: Luck and Entry Fees

Friday the 13th, an ominous day for most because of silly superstition and things no one really understands. The origins of the day have long been discussed and fails to have a satisfactory answer. The reasons rarely have any attachment to reality (or each other) and are usually the long form of “we picked it at random”. In fact, here’s a couple I always find amusing myself:

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